Swimsuitologist

One-Piece Wednesday: Judit Masco, 1991

2012-02-29T06:40:00.002-06:00

Welcome Back, Ariel Meredith

2012-02-27T21:59:00.004-06:00

She looks fantastic.Why did they let her take those two issues off? I'd love to see her back next year.She's right at home.

Adaorable

2012-02-23T19:25:00.004-06:00

Apparently, today is the birthday of gorgeous rookie Adaora.Also apparently, we have seen Adaora before. She competed in 2005’s “Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model Search” reality show, as Adaora Akubilo.That’s her, top and center.

She was eliminated in Week 2, and eventually Alicia Hall would prevail.Ariel Meredith, Bar Refaeli, and now Adaora? 2012 has been Old Home Week for SI.

Somewhere, I believe I have a stack of old VHS tapes with all the episodes from that TV show. It would be interesting to revisit her initial brush with the swimsuit issue.

One-Piece Wednesday: Irina Shayk, 2012

2012-02-22T17:58:00.006-06:00

"We need someone crazy and sexy enough to wander around with a cheetah on a leash.""Call in Irina."

Looks like we can now identify the girl in this preview.And, we have another catsuit to go with Michelle's and Brooklyn's.

Jessica Perez Does Not Disappoint

2012-02-19T11:54:00.002-06:00

She rewards her voters with one of the best pictorials of 2012.

Bar and the Boys

2012-02-18T11:52:00.006-06:00

As I hoped, there are several photos of Bar without any beefcake. And they’re gorgeous.The athlete pictures are interesting. The swimsuit issue has featured male athletes before, but always in these fairly tame (and actually pretty sweet) pairings with their wives.Wow, Debbie Clemens looks really buff, doesn’t she?
But these 2012 pics, of Rafael Nadal, Chris Paul, and Michael Phelps, are the most sexually charged, pinup-style images of men they’ve featured.I wonder what the thought is behind them. Is SI dipping its toe into trying to appeal to a female demographic? Is this (coupled with the female athletes in body paint) an attempt to force more “sports” into “Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue”?

In any case, I don’t mind it, as long as they keep the cake and the ice cream separate. The swimsuit issue fantasy involves me being the only male in existence, so there should be plenty of man-free photos of the girls.Also, I don’t want to be crass, but these are young, virile, athletic guys in their 20s, and they’re intertwining their bodies with a bikini-clad Bar Refaeli. How is every shot not just a picture of their boners?

Maybe they’re nervous. But I like to think they were coached ahead of time. “Okay, if you need a break, just signal the makeup person with this discreet hand gesture, and she’ll announce that you need some powder. You will have three minutes in the next room.”

Finally, I’m straight but I’m not blind. In the pics with Bar and Rafael Nadal, it’s almost a coin toss as to who I should be looking at.

One-Piece Wednesday: Jessica Gomes, 2012

2012-02-15T05:36:00.003-06:00

Barely glanced at the pics yet. I've noticed that there are fewer photos per model this year, but the photos are huge and supersaturated with color.Also, I've noticed that Jessica Gomes is in fine form.

One-Hit Wonder: Shana Zadrick (1992)

2012-02-14T07:33:00.007-06:00

Well, there's not much going on in Swimsuitland, so I thought I'd celebrate the 43rd birthday of Shana Zadrick.She was born in Colorado, but she has the look of one of the luxurious Czech chicks from the 80s and 90s.Or even a young Cindy Crawford.She definitely had the potential to stick around, but when 1993 rolled around Shana had disappeared from the swimsuit issue's pages.

If anything new happens on the scene (no Brooklyn?!) I'll keep you updated.

It Was Inevitable

2012-02-13T19:57:00.012-06:00

Kate Upton is your 2012 Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue cover girl.Wow. About a year and a half ago, I wondered if the trend was going to be toward larger bikini bottoms. This seems to be a resounding "no."

Frankly, I think those bottoms are a little too skimpy. They might have crossed over from "sexy" to "look what we can get away with." I don't know. Maybe I need time to digest. (And maybe swimsuit issue covers aren't the place to look for subtlety.)

Kate is not the first girl to jump from rookie one year to cover the next. She joins a small club of models who made the cover in their sophomore years.
Carol Alt
Debut: 1981. Cover: 1982.
Paulina Porizkova
Debut: 1983. Cover: 1984.
Elle Macpherson
Debut: 1985. Cover: 1986.
Vendela
Debut: 1992. Cover: 1993.
Tyra Banks*
Debut: 1993. Cover: 1996.*Tyra skipped a couple years after rookiehood, then came roaring back with two consecutive covers.

Carolyn Murphy
Debut: 2004. Cover: 2005.(And yes, there's a handful of models who have made the cover their first time out.)

In other news, Hot Clicks has revealed that Bar Refaeli will be posing with athletes this year.
(That face is Hot Clicks author Jimmy Traina, by the by.)

I have nothing against hunky, shirtless guys per se, but I do hope there are plenty of dude-free photos of Bar this year. It would be a shame to have any obstacles in the way of her.

According to the cover, there are 18 models this year. That's one more than last year. Here's a nice preview of Alyssa Miller.Her hair is significantly lighter.

What else? If you need a little appetizer, Kate has a new photoshoot, video, and interview at Esquire.com.Good grief. That girl is so sexy it isn't even funny.

So, the Grammys Are Tonight

2012-02-12T13:30:00.001-06:00

Two Announcements

2012-02-10T22:42:00.002-06:00

1) Women's soccer star Alex Morgan (along with two other yet-unnamed athletes) will be donning bodypaint for 2012.2) Bar is back!

2012 So Far...

2012-02-09T21:21:00.006-06:00

So, we know we've got Ariel Meredith, Anne V, Julie Henderson, Kate Upton, Chrissy Teigen, Jessica Perez, and Alyssa Miller (who does a spot-on Alyssa Miller impersonation).And Hot Clicks has promised some swimsuit news in the morning. Meanwhile, they give us a nice little Selita Ebanks retrospective.It's like Christmas is coming.

One-Piece Wednesday: Naomi Campbell, 1992

2012-02-08T23:00:00.000-06:00

Expectation

2012-02-06T19:10:00.006-06:00

Brooklyn tweeted this photo today, of her poster for the movie "What to Expect When You're Expecting."Alas, I'm not exactly the target audience for this movie. Perhaps someday she'll be in a film I want to see.

This won't be it.

One Last Bit of "Sports" to Get Out of the Way

2012-02-05T08:59:00.002-06:00

Today we dispense with the last sporting event before the long winter wasteland—the wasteland that gave rise to the swimsuit issue in the first place.

Then barely a week later, we’ll discover the cover model, and all the models behind her.

Brazilian Bikini Line

2012-02-03T20:54:00.012-06:00

BroBible.com has made a list of 50 great Brazilian bikini models, and as you can imagine, there’s a healthy helping of SI girls included. These are “under the radar” models, and Ana Beatriz Barros and Izabel Goulart are disqualified right from the title: “The 50 Hottest Brazilian Bikini Models Not Named Adriana, Gisele, Alessandra, Izabel, or Ana Beatriz.”

(There are, however, five Fernandas.)

It’s a gorgeous list, surveying the bikini-clad bounty of that astonishing country. Though it’s really 49 models, since (as with last year’s 100 Hottest Brunette Lingerie Models) there’s a double. Jeisa Chiminazzo appears twice, at #17 and #50.

#10 Elisandra Tomacheski(Not technically a full-fledged SI model. She was one of the models Jessica Perez beat out to make her debut in the 2012 issue. But Elisandra is pretty dreamy, so I'll let her in.)

#11 Ana Paula Araujo
#16 Fernanda Motta
#17 Jeisa Chiminazzo
#18 Daniella Sarahyba
#22 Michelle Alves
#24 Fernanda Tavares
#25 Aline Nakashima
#27 Juliana Martins
#28 Raica Oliveira
#38 Isabeli Fontana
#41 Yasmin Brunet
#50 Jeisa Chiminazzo (oops)You know what? I'm glad Jeisa is in here twice. I wanted her to return after her 2008 debut, but she vanished. She’ll be featured on these pages as a one-hit wonder one day.

One-Piece Wednesday: Anne V, 2005

2012-02-01T06:15:00.001-06:00

Anne V has been announced as one of our 2012 models.It will be her eighth consecutive year, so let's peek at a one-piece from her first.

Her?

2012-01-31T07:27:00.003-06:00

Yes, her. Patricia Velasquez is 41 today.True fans know her as an SI model in 1994 and 1995, but also as Marta (the second one) in Arrested Development.What a fun, sexy time for her!

A One-Hit Wonder No More

2012-01-30T22:24:00.004-06:00

The announcement rang out today: After a two-issue hiatus, Ariel Meredith is returning to the swimsuit issue in 2012.Welcome back, Ariel!

A Bikini Addict is Jonesing

2012-01-27T14:09:00.006-06:00

A new bikini-obsessed blog called The Bikini Addict has listed its predictions for the 2012 cover.

The author's picks are Kate Upton, Chrissy Teigen, or Hilary Rhoda.

I think the smart money is on Kate, myself.But it would be churlish of me not to post photos of the other girls.
Meanwhile, it might be fun to visit The Lowdown Blog's predictions from way back on February 22, 2011. The ink was still wet on last year's issue, but they made some long-term guesses on this year's, leading with Cintia Dicker. (Personally, I would love that.)They follow up, in descending order of likelihood, with Kate Upton, Chrissy Teigen, Julie Henderson, Genevieve Morton, Anne V, and Irina Shayk.

Once-Piece Wednesday: The 1977 Swimsuit Issue

2012-01-25T07:04:00.010-06:00

Way back on the first One-Piece Wednesday, I mentioned the all-bikini 1997 issue and asserted that it was “an honor that will never be bestowed on one-piecers.”

I was wrong. It happened twenty years earlier.

I was virtually flipping through some old swimsuit issues online when I noticed something about 1977. Every suit in the magazine, including the cover, was a one-piecer. (Click on the “VIEW THIS ISSUE” link, and you’ll get a nifty interactive window.)At first, I figured that it was a coincidence, made possible by the more modest attitude and shorter pictorials of earlier swimsuit issues.

But then I read Jule Campbell’s introduction, under the headline “Tank Heaven for Not So Little Girls.”Annette Kellerman would love it. Tank suits—or racing suits, one-piece suits, maillots—are back. Not that they ever were away; it's just that this year they're what everyone, not only the Enders and Babashoffs, will be wearing. But Annette wouldn't recognize them. Even the new Speedo (above, $27) is super snug and snazzy.

This was only the 14th swimsuit issue, back when the magazine had a lot more “fashion” commentary.

(Annette Kellerman, by the way, was arrested in 1907 for wearing a one-piecer in public—scandalous at the time. A year later, she was named the Perfect Woman by Harvard because of her Venus de Milo body. Thanks, Wikipedia!)Cheryl Tiegs, in her sixth swimsuit issue, and despite appearing on the cover two years earlier, only appears in one photo:…which is slipped in under a couple photos of cover girl Lena Kansbod.There are four shots each of Lena and the refreshingly named Barbara Minty:Barbara (in that last pic, anyway) bears a striking resemblance to 2011 SI model contestant Tamiris Freitas.An entire issue dedicated to one-piecers. Who knew?

I feel confident we’ll never see the likes of it again. One-piecers are the giant pandas of the swimsuit issue. You’re just as likely to see models not wearing suits at all.But something warms my heart to know that three beautiful, sheathed models graced SI’s pages 35 years ago.

Seal Without a Kiss

2012-01-22T17:55:00.005-06:00

Carol Alt tweeted today:That's a shame. I don't follow their personal lives at all, but I got the feeling they'd be one of the celebrity couples that would last.Well, best wishes to both of them. And I'd be remiss if I didn't take the opportunity to post a photo of a paint-bikini-clad Heidi Klum.Oh, and thanks to her fellow cover model for breaking the news.

Happy Birthday, Raica Oliveira

2012-01-22T08:20:00.001-06:00

28 today.

48 Years Ago Today

2012-01-20T04:17:00.002-06:00

1/20/64: the cover date of the first swimsuit issue.

One-Piece Wednesday: Rachel Hunter & Elle Macpherson, 1991

2012-01-18T19:58:00.002-06:00

Which Rookies Will Return?

2012-01-14T14:26:00.010-06:00

SI has been taunting us with the fact that there are barely 30 days until the swimsuit issue comes out. Soon, we will know which of the five 2011 rookies will return, and which of them will become one-hit wonders. My predictions, from most likely to least likely:

#1: Kate UptonThis is a no-brainer. I think riots would break out if she's gone in 2012. (I foresee a not-minor uproar if she isn't the cover girl.)

#2: Alyssa MillerNot only is she drop-dead gorgeous, but she's the only rookie who got three separate shoots in 2011: bodypainting, Hawaii, Fiji.

#3: Kenza FouratiShe's my personal obsession. I hope I'm not being too optimistic; I'd love to see more from her.

#4: Izabel GoulartShe's filling the void left by Daniella Sarahyba, but does she have the staying power to repeat?

#5: Shannan ClickShe had the fewest photos online of any of the rookies, and I just got a nagging feeling that she didn't, well, click.

We'll find out soon enough. And then we'll have a new batch of rookies to speculate about.

Happy Birthday, Vendela

2012-01-12T18:44:00.003-06:00

I like this shot better than her cover shot.Still a weird, weird suit.

One-Piece Wednesday: Kim Cloutier, 2009

2012-01-11T06:20:00.001-06:00

Happy Birthday, Mallory Snyder

2012-01-07T09:56:00.002-06:00

Let's not let Mallory get too overshadowed by Irina! The pillow-lipped 2005/06 model is 28 today.

Irina Shayk in UK Esquire

2012-01-06T07:41:00.004-06:00

Gracious.Happy 26th, Irina.

Calendar Girls

2012-01-04T19:41:00.008-06:00

Happy 2012.

I recently picked up this year’s swimsuit desk calendar, like I have every year since 1990.This means I have 23 of them. That’s almost a quarter of a century.

It dawned on me that the first one I ever bought (1990, with Stephanie Seymour on the cover):…is older than a lot of the models who have appeared in the swimsuit issue.

And since these are calendars, that means you can point to the exact dates that those girls were born.

It’s kind of a flash realization of how old I am. But why not have fun with it?

There are four models I can find who were born in 1990 or later. Here are their birthdays, highlighted.

3/6/90: Elle Macpherson presides over the birth of Esti Ginzburg.
7/4/90: Rachel Hunter and Maria von Hartz welcome Alyssa Miller.
10/10/90: Maria is present for her second model: Damaris Lewis.
6/10/92: Angie Everhart peeks from the bamboo as Kate Upton arrives.
As the years go by, that number will only go up.

The Year in Kate

2011-12-31T08:24:00.002-06:00

Happy New Year.Complex has just created a wonderful retrospective of Kate Upton's lovely existence.

Here's to more of her, and her fellow SI models, in 2012.

One-Piece Wednesday: Daniella Sarahyba, 2008

2011-12-28T19:30:00.000-06:00

Legend in the Making

2011-12-27T23:41:00.000-06:00

Congrats on your engagement, Chrissy.

Since We've No Place to Go...

2011-12-24T11:18:00.003-06:00

Let it snow...Let it snow...Let it snow.Happy holidays.

One-Piece Wednesday: Josie Maran, 2001

2011-12-21T20:56:00.001-06:00

Kathy Coverage

2011-12-19T19:55:00.005-06:00

Modelina has a nice little retrospective: "Looking Back at Sports Illustrated's 25th Anniversary Issue."They wonder if 2013's 50th Anniversary Issue will live up to Kathy's 25th Anniversary Issue.

Looks like they made the same blunder I did a while back. 2013 would be the 50th swimsuit issue, but only the 49th anniversary. (If 1989 was the 25th anniversary, then the 50th will be in 2014.)

One-Piece Wednesday: Estelle Lefebure, 1993

2011-12-14T21:21:00.001-06:00

Happy Birthday, Elsa Benitez

2011-12-08T07:46:00.000-06:00

The drop-dead gorgeous 2001 cover girl is 35.

Oh, Christie...

2011-12-07T20:09:00.004-06:00

Christie Brinkley promises she'll promptly pay over $530,000 in back taxes.

Christie, if it will help, here you are in your third One-Piece Wednesday.

Sweet + Boozy = Chrissy

2011-12-04T16:20:00.003-06:00

I would be remiss if I didn't plug Chrissy Teigen's appearance on the Cooking Channel. "Cookies & Cocktails" premieres tonight, I think.

Here's Chrissy. I thought this shot was fitting, because I understand this type of sandy coating is known in the industry as "Shake & Bake."

Blondes in Their Underthings!

2011-12-04T14:39:00.010-06:00

Continuing my important work of picking out SI models from other site’s hot girls lists, I bring you BroBible’s hottest blonde swimsuit issue models who are also lingerie models.

Blondes#5: Esti Ginzburg
#14: Shannan Click
#18: Ana Beatriz Barros
#20: Jessica Hart
#39: Anne V
#40: Jessica Perez
#42: Petra Nemcova
#59: Tori Praver
#68: Jessica Van Der Steen
#88: Marisa Miller
#90: Kate Upton
#92: Bar Refaeli
#95: Brooklyn Decker
And, just because I sense she’s feeling left out, here’s a lovely shot of Cintia Dicker.

Brunettes in Their Underthings!

2011-12-03T12:17:00.014-06:00

You may remember that over the summer, the bros at Guyism.com announced their 100 Sexiest Lingerie Models in the World.

Not to be outdone, the guys at BroBible.com recently doubled that number—and color-coded it. In two parts, they listed the 100 Hottest Brunette Lingerie Models and the 100 Hottest Blonde Lingerie Models.

With the longer list, they had room to top Guyism’s list of 17 SI models by including 24. Well, that’s not technically true. BroBible slipped up a little, counting Isabeli Fontana twice among the brunettes, at #68 and #90, calling the science of the whole experiment into question.

Guyism’s entire lineup of SI girls is repeated in BroBible’s, with one exception: Cintia Dicker. An obvious redhead, she was disqualified from either of BroBible’s lists.

Shall we take a gander?
Brunettes#38: Pania Rose
#42: Jarah Mariano
#54: Izabel Goulart
#60: Lucia Dvorska
#63: Selita Ebanks
#68: Isabeli Fontana
#80: Kim Cloutier
#90: Isabeli Fontana (oops)
#91: Raica Oliveira
#95: Irina Shayk
#100: Alyssa Miller
Tomorrow: The Blondes.

Happy Birthday, Carol Alt

2011-12-01T07:32:00.002-06:00

My newest Twitter follower is 51.

Darcie Baum, You're Killing Me

2011-11-30T22:40:00.002-06:00

This means there's a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model wearing nothing but paint being photographed somewhere in the world right now.

Happy Birthday, Chrissy Teigen

2011-11-30T19:56:00.005-06:00

Normally, I'd combine this news with One-Piece Wednesday, but pics of Chrissy in a one-piece are in short supply. I've already used her pink knit 2010 one. And this one from 2011:...Well, it's frankly not the most attractive suit. So let's celebrate her 26th with this heart-stopping shot.

Jarah Mariano

2011-11-27T09:28:00.001-06:00

In the blur of Thanksgiving, I missed Jarah Mariano's birthday on Wednesday.This is probably my favorite photo of her, from 2008. It could have been the cover.

I Don't Mean to Brag, But...

2011-11-19T13:22:00.003-06:00

I do have a Twitter account, but there's not much in the way of tweets. (I use it to follow, not to be followed.) Still, Ms. Alt, it is an honor.

Happy Birthday, Shannan Click

2011-11-17T07:19:00.001-06:00

The 2011 rookie is 28.

One-Piece Wednesday: 2012 Mystery Ladies

2011-11-16T20:46:00.006-06:00

Last Friday, @darciebaum tweeted this:...which linked to this:It was one of a series of promising one-piecers we've gotten a glimpse of from Darcie and MJ.I'm particularly enthralled with upper-left (Kate Upton perhaps?) and lower-right (a rookie? That's a very sexy corner-of-the-mouth..).

I've been snatching up all the preview shots I can (well, the ones that don't get taken down for some prudish reason or another). It will be fun to try to match the sneak-preview tweets with the models, once February rolls around.

Lap Full of Caps

2011-11-14T22:49:00.004-06:00

@SI_Swimsuit posted a link to a Gillette "Rookie to Cover" site from a year or two ago, where you can follow the journeys of Brooklyn Decker, Marisa Miller, Petra Nemcova, Veronica Varekova, and Rebecca Romijn from their first appearances in the magazine to their covers some years later.

One of the 2002 shots of Veronica shows her in her Dos Equis bottlecap bikini.
Now wait a second. When this pic was published, it looked like this:They edited out her bikini bottom.

I have spent nine years filled with sympathy for how painful that suit must have been to wear. And it was just more bikini bottom trickery from SI.

Happy Birthday, Rebecca Romijn

2011-11-06T11:11:00.002-06:00

This gorgeous all-star is 39 today.

November: Time to Give Thanks

2011-11-04T22:52:00.006-05:00

Guyism has included several deserving SI girls in their list of the "100 women we're most thankful for in 2011."
#63 Bar Refaeli
#61 Cindy Crawford
#60 Heidi Klum
#53 Brooklyn Decker
#43 Alyssa Miller
#42 Chrissy Teigen
#38 Christie Brinkley
#30 Irina Shayk
#26 Cintia Dicker
#17 Estella Warren
#1 Kate Upton

Backwards & Forwards

2011-11-02T03:47:00.012-05:00

It's 11/02/2011. The date is a palindrome. Let's pay tribute to our palindromic models.

Elle.
Ana.
Ana.
Hannah.
And let's round it out with a few mirror images.
Yamila.
Anne.
Irina.
Mallory.
Jessica.
Alyssa.
Kenza.
And as long as we have them around:
Yvonne and Yvette.

Halloween Wrap-Up

2011-10-31T21:19:00.007-05:00

Jessica Perez as a dude.
Brooklyn Decker as a chicken.
Jessica Gomes as Girl Who Got "Cut by a Vampire."
Kate Upton as Zombie Marilyn Monroe.
Chrissy Teigen as a Toddler in a Tiara.
And finally, Modelinia.com has a nice time-lapse video of Heidi Klum's horrific transformation.

Happy Mollyween

2011-10-31T07:05:00.005-05:00

Molly Sims tweeted this yesterday:...which led to this photo:I'm a little surprised, because it flies in the face of this campaign (almost eerily so). So let's help Molly tiptoe around the controversy with a couple of spooooky orange-and-black bikinis from 2004.Whaddaya say, Molly? Maybe go as an SI model instead?

Klum in Kostum

2011-10-30T10:16:00.008-05:00

Heidi Klum has become renowned for her annual Halloween party (and the insanely intricate costumes she wears to them). Here’s a nice gallery of her disguises, from Sexy Cat:…to Betty Boop:…to Kali, Hindu Destroyer Goddess:…to, I guess, Vampire Lady Godiva:
Last night she tweeted her 2011 costume as a work-in-progress. Let’s take a look!She is gorgeous isn’t she?

Oh, a bald cap. Maybe… Kojak? Uncle Fester?

Oh, good lord…

A skinned corpse. Wow.

Let’s cleanse the palate a little. In 2002, for GQ's 45th Anniversary Issue, Klum donned the mantles of several twentieth-century Sex Goddesses, from Brigitte Bardot to Farrah Fawcett to Phoebe Cates to Jessica Rabbit.Beauty may be only skin deep, but I prefer Heidi with that skin to without.

A Few SI Models in Costume

2011-10-29T17:11:00.002-05:00

From Twitter:
Ana Beatriz Barros & friends.
Jessica Gomes & Kate Upton.

One-Piece Wednesday: Rebecca Romijn, 1998

2011-10-26T21:05:00.000-05:00

Jessica Gomes: Woman of Mystery and Contradictions

2011-10-21T15:03:00.004-05:00

Jessica is in the November Maxim.Some photos, an interview, and a video can be found here.

A couple things:

In the video interview, she has this to day:
That was probably the craziest thing that I've read. People were like, "Oh, she's, are they fake? They're fake boobs." I mean, trust me, I know that they're big, but they're real, and I would never pay money to get these boobs because they are quite annoying.

Unless she went through puberty after her first appearance in 2008, you may color me skeptical...

But weirder still, in the same interview, she pronounces her last name as rhyming with "homes."

I poked around online, and she also pronounces it that way in her SI 2011 profile.

But, in 2009, she clearly pronounced it "Gomez."

I am especially mortified because I corrected Kanye West on his pronunciation a year ago.

Jessica Gomes, you have made a liar out of me!I... I can't stay mad at you.

One-Piece Wednesday: Rachel Hunter, 1993

2011-10-19T07:19:00.000-05:00

Gorgeous.

Pretty in Pink

2011-10-15T10:38:00.000-05:00

On SI.com, they’ve put up a photo gallery entitled “SI Swimsuit Models in Pink,” with this paragraph of explanation:

October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. To mark the occasion, here are some of SI's most popular swimsuit models (past and present) wearing pink.

Frankly, the whole endeavor is more than a little creepy to me. But I will draw attention to it because it includes this beautiful photo of Stacey Williams.

Izabel Goulart in Gentlemen's Quarterly

2011-10-14T21:48:00.004-05:00

Izabel Goulart has a new spread in GQ.But why is she wearing so much clothing?Thaaaat's better.

One-Piece Wednesday: Judit Masco, 1991

2011-10-12T05:42:00.006-05:00

An amusing exchange between the swimsuit issue and a reader came in 1991. SI's caption for this pic of Judit:...was "As evening falls at Grace Bay, Judit realizes that all good things must come to an end. Her star-and-moon applique suit ($85) is from Keiko."

This prompted a certain Mr. Colton to write:
Well played, John. And happy 42nd, Judit Masco.

Happy Birthday, Damaris Lewis

2011-10-10T07:29:00.002-05:00

She's 21.Enjoy your first beer!

The Sports Illustrated Curse Strikes Again

2011-10-06T06:54:00.000-05:00

Yesterday morning, Hot Clicks on SI.com posted this.By the end of the day, we had lost Steve Jobs.

RIP to someone who changed the world to an astonishing degree during a very short life.

One-Piece Wednesday: Yamila Diaz, 2001

2011-10-05T18:40:00.002-05:00

Congratulations, Genevieve Morton

2011-10-04T21:19:00.003-05:00

She's the cover model of the "swimwear issue" for Sports Illustrated South Africa, 2011.

Here Comes the Bride, All Dressed in White

2011-10-01T10:47:00.004-05:00

A belated congratulations to Molly Sims on her nuptials last week.I wonder if she got that diamond bikini she had on her registry.

Heart: Racing

2011-09-30T10:44:00.008-05:00

The big news the other day was that a game called "Need For Speed: The Run" is going to feature a digital Chrissy Teigen and Irina Shayk, along with "mild suggestive themes."The plot: You have to drive really fast across the country to something something. And Chrissy and Irina are friends who race against you.

This makes Chrissy and Irina absolutely the ~~first and~~ second and third SI models to appear in a "Need For Speed" video game.

Josie Maran did the honors for "Need For Speed: Most Wanted," playing "Mia Townsend," the character who guides you through the game. Or something. I'm not a gamer.But I get Josie and Irina. They look like badass video game chicks.Chrissy is a little too cute and innocent looking.Maybe Irina does the driving, and Chrissy flicks you off in traffic and then tweets about you.

Anyway, what's lost in all this is that there's a girl who's made the opposite leap, from racecar driver to swimsuit model. Danica Patrick doesn't do much for me personally, but her second appearance, in 2009, yielded some nice shots.

One-Piece Wednesday: Ashley Richardson, 1993

2011-09-28T21:00:00.003-05:00

The Queen of the One-Piece, Ashley Richardson, in Martha's Vineyard.

Happy Birthday, Cheryl and Jessica

2011-09-25T08:51:00.003-05:00

Two great birthdays today.

SI's first supermodel, Cheryl Tiegs, is 64.
And a current one, Jessica Gomes, is 26.I still love Jessica, even if I haven’t solved the mystery of what happened to her bikini top in the years since her first appearance in 2008.
But they both rock a white, translucent fishnet one-piece. So happy birthday, girls.

Some Historian I Turned Out to Be

2011-09-23T12:35:00.001-05:00

Back in February, I took Lowdown Blog and Bro Bible to task for thinking that the 2011 swimsuit issue was the 49th and 38th, respectively. I corrected them:

“Guys—it’s the 47th.”

Well, guess what? It’s actually the 48th.

To make up for my ineptitude at simple counting, here is one of my favorite photos of Rebecca Romijn.How did I screw it up? I have a theory.

I knew offhand that the 25th Anniversary issue was in 1989. So I think I started with that issue as the 25th swimsuit issue, then added 22: one for each year from 1990-2011.

What I failed to take into account: The 25th Anniversary issue was actually the 26th swimsuit issue. Which makes sense. (The first anniversary issue would have been the second issue overall. And your 25th birthday is actually the 26th time you’ve experienced that date.)

So, 2011 was the 48th swimsuit issue, and the 47th anniversary.

Wasn’t that interesting?

Ahem.

Rebecca, you’re needed again.

One-Piece Wednesday: Stephanie Seymour, 1991

2011-09-21T07:03:00.002-05:00

Happy Birthday, Noemie Lenoir

2011-09-19T07:25:00.002-05:00

She's 32 today.Between her and Ana Beatriz Barros, I can't figure out who's sultrier, with their wavy hair and their sleepy, ravenous eyes.

The Swimsuit Contest Curse

2011-09-16T19:51:00.009-05:00

Today is Michelle Lombardo's 28th birthday.She won the Sports Illustrated "Fresh Face" contest, landing her in the 2005 issue (and a lot of scuba gear).Of course, another contest winner made her debut in 2005, this one as the result of a reality show, "Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Model Search." That girl was Alicia Hall.
(Though I was heartily rooting for the runner-up, Shannon Hughes.)Both Michelle and Alicia ended up as one-hit wonders, never to appear in the magazine's pages again. Is there a swimsuit issue contest curse?

If, a year and a half from now, Jessica Perez fails to appear in the 2013 issue, we'll know something supernatural is afoot.

One-Piece Wednesday: Patricia Velasquez, 1994

2011-09-14T06:50:00.001-05:00

Two Melissas Enter. One Melissa Leaves.

2011-09-09T08:05:00.004-05:00

In 2008, we were presented with two remarkably similar models. Each had long, dark hair and a deep, sultry look and a sleekly solid build.

Each was named Melissa.Melissa Baker (left) and Melissa Haro (right). They could be each other’s soap opera twins—the good girl gone bad and the bad girl gone good. A yin and yang of hot brunette.They seem so alike, I almost suspect a clerical error; two statuesque, raven-tressed Melissas were accidentally entered into the database at the same time. They were even born one month and one day apart in 1987 (Haro on September 5, Baker on October 6).Clearly, only one could survive.

Haro went on to pose again in 2009.And Baker was entered into the record books as a one-hit wonder.

One-Piece Wednesday: Angie Everhart, 1995

2011-09-07T06:40:00.003-05:00

The SI redhead against whom all other SI redheads will be judged is 42 today.

White Swimsuit Week, 2011: Part Eight

2011-09-05T06:36:00.001-05:00

We wrap up the week with Melissa Haro, who is 24 today.More on Melissa later this week.

White Swimsuit Week, 2011: Part Seven

2011-09-04T07:45:00.009-05:00

The ultimate White Swimsuit Party was held for the 2006 cover.The ladies look great individually too (as evidenced by the hard-hitting journalism covering the shoot). So let’s enjoy them in chronological order of their first cover appearances.

Elle.
Rachel.
Daniela.
Rebecca.
Elsa.
Yamila.
Veronica.
Carolyn.

White Swimsuit Week, 2011: Part Six

2011-09-03T07:39:00.001-05:00

I bemoaned the absence of Molly’s abs when she appeared in a recent One-Piece Wednesday. Let’s make up for it here.

White Swimsuit Week, 2011: Part Five

2011-09-02T12:03:00.000-05:00

Naomi Campbell, pensive in white.

White Swimsuit Week, 2011: Part Four

2011-09-01T06:27:00.002-05:00

Angie Everhart, rocking a white bikini.

White One-Piece Wednesday: Stacey Williams, 1993

2011-08-31T06:35:00.003-05:00

Part three of White Swimsuit Week, as always, falls on One-Piece Wednesday. Here’s Stacey Williams.

White Swimsuit Week, 2011: Part Two

2011-08-30T06:08:00.003-05:00

We continue with Christie Brinkley.

White Swimsuit Week, 2011: Part One

2011-08-29T05:55:00.001-05:00

It is the week before Labor Day. That means we begin saying goodbye to summer, and it’s the last week you’re allowed to wear white. So let’s parade some white swimsuits while it is still legal to do so.

First, the aptly named Jessica White, from 2004.

2012 Mystery Models

2011-08-28T14:58:00.008-05:00

MJ Day tweeted this today:The link takes you to this photo:I ... can't begin to imagine what exactly is going on here. But I have a strong feeling that the girl on the right is Julie Henderson. She has that small horizontal crease just above her navel:As for the other girl, dunno... Alyssa Miller?

Here are a few other preview shots from MJ, for your speculation pleasure.

One-Piece Wednesday: Julie Henderson, 2008

2011-08-24T18:59:00.002-05:00

2011 in Review

2011-08-21T19:20:00.011-05:00

So, we’re half a year past the 2011 issue. Let’s take a look back.

Weirdest SuitsBrooklyn Decker’s lion design.
Damaris Lewis’s “groped-by-shadows” one-piece.
Kenza Fourati’s bikini bottom constructed of jimmies.
Oddest TrendCoral as decorative fan.
Toplessest GirlJessica White appears without her top in 9 of her 42 online photos, which is over 21%.
Most Amazing OutieIzabel Goulart’s bellybutton enters a room a few seconds before the rest of her does.
Most Titillating RevelationShannan Click has done some bondage photography, and not just in the suggestive way my sick brain tends to see.A couple years ago, she did some sort of artsy/kinky fashion spread for something called Exit magazine. (NSFW)
Early 2012 Cover Predictions?#3: Brooklyn Decker
#2: Julie Henderson
#1: Kate Upton

One-Piece Wednesday: Irina Shayk, 2011

2011-08-17T07:14:00.003-05:00

It's been six months. We're halfway to the 2012 swimsuit issue. Here's the 2011 cover girl in one of the very few one-piecers from that year.

Marisa of Disguise

2011-08-13T21:34:00.015-05:00

There exists a series of photos of Marisa Miller recreating shots of prominent models throughout the swimsuit issue’s history. I am ashamed to say that I’m not sure of the story behind them.

I got it into my head that they were released in 2004 as part of the 40th anniversary issue. (The SI.com gallery of Marisa seems to support that.) But I have the 2004 issue, and these photos of Marisa don’t appear in it.

I have seen some video footage of Marisa’s shoot, but I can’t seem to find it online anymore.

The confusion is compounded by the fact that a lot of the original photos on SI.com seem to be labeled as if part of the 50th anniversary. (For example, the files of Cheryl’s and Heidi’s are labeled 50th_ctiegs_01.jpg and 50th_hklum_01.jpg, respectively.) But the 50th anniversary won’t happen for a few more years.

Nevertheless, the shots are fascinating. With Marisa recreating, as accurately as possible, the swimsuit shots of models from previous decades, she creates the sensation of two women in the same bikini, a superconcentrated supermodel.

Marisa as Cheryl Tiegs (1978)Marisa has more curves up top, and fewer down below, than Cheryl did. But I’m impressed that they were willing to show the fishnet in all (or most) of its translucent glory.

Marisa as Christie Brinkley (1981)Frankly, I think there are better photos of Christie, but it’s hard to argue with that expanse of silky skin (X2).

Marisa as Paulina Porizkova (1985)Again, Marisa’s “modern” breast size interferes with the accuracy of this one, but a pretty beautiful setup.

Marisa as Kathy Ireland (1986)This one might be the best. Done up like this, even Marisa’s face looks like Kathy’s. If I didn’t know this was an impostor, I might not have even suspected.

Marisa as Elle Macpherson (1990)I miss the sheen on Elle’s midriff. Pretty gorgeous, though.

Marisa as Stacey Williams (1993)I’m thrilled that they did Stacey. Sadly, this was the one I had the hardest time finding a pic of online. The Marisa shot seems to be from a print magazine, but which print magazine?

Marisa as Daniela Pestova (1995)They went a little too severe on the hair, but otherwise a very convincing simulacrum.

Marisa as Tyra Banks (1997)This could have been touchy, but they played it well. Just dye Marisa’s hair black, don’t worry about the skin tone. Also, Marisa’s boob-to-hip ratio seems to be best suited for reproducing Tyra.

Marisa as Sarah O’Hare (1999)Interesting. Sarah O’Hare is the least “household” of the names on this list, and she only did two issues. But I think this one is more about the sand-kini than the girl wearing it.

Marisa as Heidi Klum (2000)Wow. The snake shot? Well, if you’re lucky enough to find two non-ophidiophobic swimsuit models within a five-year period, you have to go for it.

Marisa was the perfect model to do this. She had done a lot to reinvigorate the idea of the SI girl as a well-known object of worship. (Heidi Klum filled that position beautifully, but she’d been out of regular circulation for a couple years by 2004. She returned for some 1940s bodypainting for 2006 and a weird Will Ferrell movie tie-in for 2008.)

But even more importantly, she functioned well as a blank slate onto which the prominent beauties of years past could be projected.

(Though I have to admit, as Marisa Miller Week draws to a close, I have a new appreciation for her. She’s not as “cookie-cutter” or generic as I thought; those eyebrows and that smirk and those warm eyes do set her apart.)

Marisa, Marisa, Marisa

2011-08-12T12:03:00.005-05:00

As long as we’re Marisa Millering, here are a couple items from a few months ago.

To celebrate Memorial Day, Marisa tweeted a couple shots from a Harley-Davidson "bombshell" campaign from a few years back.
Also in May, she was featured in a nice bikini spread for Esquire.This pose:…puts me in mind of this one from SI:Okay, I’m kind of drunk on Marisa right now. I’m coming around.

One-Piece Wednesday: Marisa Miller, 2003

2011-08-10T06:23:00.003-05:00

It seems to be Marisa Miller Week around here, so let's keep it rolling.

Panty-disestablishmentarianism

2011-08-07T18:03:00.018-05:00

Guyism.com recently listed their picks for the 100 Sexiest Lingerie Models in the World. 17 of them are swimsuit issue girls, four of whom have been on the cover.

If Sports Illustrated is the models’ day job, here are the girls in their night jobs.

#77: Jessica Hart
#73: Jessica Perez
#52: Jarah Mariano
#49: Cintia Dicker
#45: Ana Beatriz Barros
#42: Alyssa Miller
#26: Brooklyn Decker
#24: Shannan Click
#23: Marisa Miller
#21: Raica Oliveira
#20: Izabel Goulart
#17: Isabeli Fontana
#12: Kate Upton
#10: Selita Ebanks
#7: Kim Cloutier
#6: Irina Shayk
#4: Bar Refaeli
Long live unmentionables!

Happy Birthday, Marisa Miller

2011-08-06T10:50:00.004-05:00

I have mentioned before on these pages that I’ve never been as gaga over Marisa Miller as a lot of SI fans are. But you can’t deny the power of her popularity.She may just have ushered in a new era of supermodels. We may never see the 80s and 90s again, with their Elles and Cindys and Stephanies.But Marisa, as well as Brooklyn and Bar and Kate, may have gotten us a little closer.That is noble work, and I certainly can’t argue with it.Happy 33rd, Marisa.

Dish

2011-08-05T13:47:00.008-05:00

I loved Chrissy Teigen’s recent tweets about Yelp reviewers:…and I decided to hunt down the review she quoted. I googled it, but instead I discovered Chrissy’s food blog.It’s awesome—she remains a fun and funny writer, and she clearly loves cooking and eating.

So, in celebration, here are some SI models with food.

One-Piece Wednesday: Veronica Varekova, 2002

2011-08-03T19:00:00.000-05:00

The Bachelorette

2011-08-02T20:30:00.002-05:00

Ashley Hebert just won an immunity idol or something. I don't know. Whatever. Here she is in a red bikini bottom with shells over her boobs.

Happy Birthday, Chandra North

2011-07-31T19:29:00.004-05:00

She’s always held a deep allure for me.

In the late 90s, her seductive dark hair was cut fairly short, giving her a thoughtful & brooding look.By the early 2000s, she’d let her hair grow out, making her appear more feminine and playful.Happy 38th, Chandra.