Butt Appreciation Day 2020: The Grable

There’s something specially sexy about the Grable pose.

Her back is to you. But she’s looking over her shoulder at you and smiling.

The only logical interpretation of this illogical pose is that she is happily inviting you to stare at her butt. She just like, “Have at it.” There’s no faux candidness, like you’ve stumbled upon her while she’s luxuriating in nature. There’s no sultry glares, like she’s engaged in the deadly serious business of titillation. Just a fun “Oh you like cute butts? Enjoy!”

Three components of the Grable:

Stand.

Glance over the shoulder.

Smile.

Hazmat — Will Travel

Naomi Campbell went all out trying to protect herself during a recent flight.

Here she is in a more flattering outfit.

But please heed this PSA brought to you by the ladies of the 2009 swimsuit issue:

Don’t.

Touch.

Your.

Face. 

(Especially on the MTA, Damaris!)

Anyway, the 2020 issue is taking shape, and maybe it will provide a nice respite from the nationwide quarantine in a couple months. Watch this space.

Same Suit, Different Babe: Stacey and Britta, 1993

This was hiding in plain sight for so long.

Stacey Williams and Britta Dubbels wore the same Anne Klein suit ($108) in 1993.

Stacey Williams and shiny one-piecers are right in my wheelhouse, so I'm not sure why it took me so long to see it. But better late than never!

Same Suit, Different Babe: Chase/Haley/Olivia/Barbara

As long as I’ve popped back up …

Chase Carter was one of my favorite 2018 girls. (Dare I hope for another surprise return?)

Here she is modeling for Frankies Bikinis ...

... in a little number I first saw in SI 2019, gracing the body of Haley Kalil.

And speaking of 2019, that year introduced us to Olivia Brower, whom I’d love to see again. Here she is modeling for Indah …

… in a suit that Barbara Palvin showed us in 2018.

Re-Vita-lized

Some great news dropped this week! 2020 will mark the return of two of my favorite models of this decade, two girls I thought had disappeared forever from SI.

Vita Sidorkina …

… and Emily DiDonato …

… are shooting in Wyoming, for some reason.

That means this graphic is now happily obsolete.

I don’t think it hit me how long Emily has been gone! She skipped three swimsuit issues.

Those three issues, but the way, exactly line up with Danielle Harrington’s three appearances.

And she’s back too, in case you were harboring any conspiracy theories about Emily and Danielle being the same person.

It seems like just yesterday that the 2019 issue came out, and it kind of was. The May release screwed up my internal swimsuit clock. I wonder if 2020 will be a return to February, or if we have another long wait until spring.

Until Next Year!

Perhaps!

Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie

Erin Heatherton, 2016

Let’s call this the completion of a triptych.

Tanya Mityushina, 2016

Kate Bock, 2014

There are SI photos that are all face, no body.

Kelly Gale, 2017

Sailor Brinkley-Cook 2018

And some that are all body, no face.

Robin Holzken, 2019

Hannah Davis, 2017

A third angle comes up with surprising regularity over the last decade: all scenery.

Chrissy Teigen, 2016

Bregje Heinen, 2014

The girl is in the photo, but the shot is so wide that the surroundings are the real focus. (Well, kind of.)

Hailey Clauson, 2017

Chrissy Teigen, 2014

The model is tiny.

Chanel Iman, 2015

Kate Bock, 2017

These pics are much more common than the bodyless or headless photos.

Emily DiDonato, 2013

Yasmin Brunet, 2008

Maybe they’re in service of the idea that this isn’t just T&A — it’s about beautiful photography.

Lais Ribeiro, 2017

Nina Agdal, 2016

And exotic locations.

Jarah Mariano, 2009

Valerie van der Graaf, 2014

But it’s a nice metaphor for my pulling back from the blog again.

Chanel Iman, 2014

Adaora, 2013

Panning out, if you will.

Hannah Davis, 2016