Saturday, February 28, 2015

Kelly Comes Rohring Bach

This morning, Erin Heatherton had a hefty lead in the Rookie of the Year voting, which ends today.

But I looked just now, and suddenly Kelly Rohrbach is up.

Whatever amount of faith you put in the legitimacy of the popular vote, a leap from 32% to 35% is pretty steep this late in the game (even more so: a fall from 40% to 32%).

Erin is beautiful.

But I prefer Kelly. I think her face is striking and sexy, and I was a fan of her pics this year.

Though personally, I don’t care that much. I like the models I like, and I leave it at that. If others agree, great. I imagine a win guarantees the model will return the following year, but I don’t even know if that’s true.

I'm a fan this year of Kelly, Rose, and Robyn. Each of them has some spark that makes them stand out to me: Kelly’s alluring face, Rose’s bubbly aura, Robyn’s magnificent curves.

I have to say, I’m astonished at how low Hailey Clauson’s percentage is. She’s a freaking bombshell.

Anyway, today looks to be a battle royale between Erin and Kelly. May the best girl win.

Wednesday, February 25, 2015

One-Piece Wednesday: Ronda Rousey, 2015

Ronda has a big bout coming up this weekend, so let's honor her with a good-luck One-Piece Wednesday.

She discusses her decision to pose here, where she also introduces my new favorite euphemism: "cash and prizes."

"The agreement that me and my mom came up with was whatever you're not willing to show in public, you won't show in a magazine. So if I'm gonna tan on the beach with my top off facedown, how is that different than anything I've shot so far? If they can't see your cash and prizes, then I'm fine with it.”

Ronda is one of the more model-looking athletes they've ever featured. And in this photo, they opted not to Photoshop out her Olympic rings tattoo down by her… I guess that would be her "cash."

She's a medal-winner. She's also outspoken that fighters should get paid more than the ring girls. I wonder if she's exaggerating, but in case that's actually true—that the eye-candy gets paid more than the athletes—I definitely agree with her. Ronda's job carries a much higher risk of injury, beyond the paper cut you might get from holding up a number 3.

Good luck beating the living daylights out of Cat Zingano!

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Friday, February 20, 2015

Happy Birthday, Cindy Crawford

I was going to post the recent unretouched Marie Claire photo of her. But upon reading more about it, I learned it may have been more "unauthorized leak" than "strong and unashamed embrace of aging." So here is one of her few SI photos in existence.
Happy 49th!

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Grape Expectations

Apparently, it's National Drink Wine Day. I detect notes of gratuitous bikinis.

One-Piece Wednesday: Robyn Lawley, 2015

Robyn has the kind of curves a one-piece swimsuit loves to cling to.

Tuesday, February 17, 2015

Same Suit, Different Babe-a-Palooza

I wish I knew more about this MTV 2002 swimsuit issue special. I stumbled across these photos from backstage. They’re from the same switcheroo event as this post, where the girls dressed in each others’ swimsuits.

In these shots, they also seem to be recreating some previous covers.

Here you can see Marisa Miller as Judit Masco (1990), Melissa Keller as Tyra Banks (1997), and Annie Morton as Valeria Mazza (1996). (They’re being photographed by Petra Nemcova, no idea if she’s in disguise.)

Chandra North plays Daniela Pestova (1995), Carla Maria plays Tannia Rubiano (1971), Ana Beatriz Barros plays Tyra Banks (1996), Vanessa Lorenzo plays, perhaps, Yamila Diaz (2002).

It’s interesting to see a lot of the same covers that have since gotten additional tributes.

Also, for good measure, Here’s Chandra dressed up as Elsa Benitez.

Looks like quite a party.

In any case, one of the girls being portrayed is Valeria Mazza, who’s 43 today.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Happy Birthday, Valerie van der Graaf

Let us bid farewell to birthday girl Valerie van der Graaf, one of the 2014 rookies who did not return this year.
Happy 23rd, and thank you for your service.

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

One-Piece Wednesday: Hannah Davis, 2015

We stick with Hannah for her inauguration week, but…
…what on earth is this suit?

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Monday, February 9, 2015

Where Have You Gone, Emily DiDonato?

Emily is kind of unrecognizable in a lot of her shots. Am I wrong?

In some of the photos, I would not have recognized her face.

Which is a shame, because Emily's face is one of the most beautiful things on the planet.

There are other shots that look more like her, but these seem off (lighting/makeup/Photoshop?).

I think this one is gorgeous, though. It looks like one they might have unearthed from the 70s. I can imagine Cheryl Tiegs on the opposite page.

Sara Irina Replica

In landscape and look, Sara Sampaio seems to have channeled 2010 Irina Shayk this year.

And with this post, Irina does what I doubted was possible. She ties Kate Upton.

As of this writing, they both have 58 posts on this blog. And Kate has vanished from SI this year, so Irina may just take the lead for good.

A milestone, ladies and gentlemen.

Nina Is Simply the Tops

Nina Agdal is stunning. This is her best year yet, definitely.

I confess, I’ve never been fully gaga over her in the past, but this year she knocks it out of the park.

And guess what! She gives us another top-but-no-bottom shot.

Well done, Miss Agdal.

Get Your Kicks

Just got home from work, so I've barely cracked open the photos.

But thanks to the iPad selections at FSR, I note with joy that Sara has joined the ranks of models in suggested bondage.

Not sure if you meant it or not Sara, but thank you.

Now to browsing.

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Happy Swimsuit Eve

Tomorrow we enjoy this year’s bikini harvest. I’m bummed that Martha Hunt will not be included. (I would have bet money she’d be in, but that shows what I know.)

Tell me this wouldn’t have been welcome.

DirecTV already had a relationship with pre-SI Hannah Davis, who portrayed their Genie once upon a time.

Now they’re back with a fun (but perhaps mean) ad featuring her and two other SI cover girls: Chrissy Teigen and Nina Agdal. It uses the Rob Lowe campaign as a jumping-off point.

A few objections.

1) The “be like the sexy women, not like the ugly women” approach calls to mind the mean-spiritedness of Bar Refaeli’s eyewear ad.

2) Jeans, cats, and menial jobs have nothing to do with your TV programming.

3) The “ugly” photos of the girls are pretty awesome.

Anyway, visions of bikini bottoms will dance in my head tonight. See you tomorrow!

Friday, February 6, 2015

You Win Thumb, You Lose Thumb

I think I’ve pinpointed something that bugs me about Hannah’s cover. The combination of thumbhook and spread legs makes the pose awkward.

Irina had a similar post last year with one leg crossed in front of the other, and it worked.

Full disclosure, I love legs together anyway. But in this case it's a specific improvement. For one thing, the hips look curvier when the legs are together. And for another, if the idea is to tease the viewer with the prospect that the bottoms are about to slip off, that’s not going to happen if the legs are apart.

So Hannah’s pose looks less like a striptease and more like “Let’s see how far I can inch these down before we get kicked off this berry farm.”