Wednesday, February 28, 2018

Models Named in Suit

Seven years ago, SI made (nearly) all of the models wear gold necklaces bearing their names.

In 2016, they got out the label maker again, this time in the form of black one-piece swimsuits and only for the rookies.


They took a break from that in 2017, but this year they’re back: rookies with their names emblazoned proudly across their silver, black, or pink one-piecers.


I think it’s pretty sexy that they have their names on their suits. It’s like they’ve all been categorized and displayed for my inspection.


Happy One-Piece Wednesday.

Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Topless Tuesday: Raven Lyn, 2018


My most anticipated rookie of 2018 does not disappoint. She's quite beautiful.


Lips, eyes, freckles. I already want her back in 2019.

Saturday, February 24, 2018

Get a High-Cut, Hippy!

I feel I’ve droned on a bit about the high-cut swimsuits of the 80s and how they shaped my interest in the female body. But I’m impressed with how well 2018 has been infused with that decade.

It’s not just the cut of the suits. It’s the color schemes, patterns, accessories — maybe even the type of posing. I don’t know enough about modeling or photography to delve into the secret sauce, but I get a deep stirring of déjà vu at how well they invoke the decade I discovered the swimsuit issue.

These shots of Vita and Kate look for all the world like posters I might have hung in my bedroom in 1987.


And Hailey in this dream of neon yellow and grape-candy purple and retro roller skates makes me feel like I’m in seventh grade again.


But yeah, that high-cut thigh. Rookie Chase Carter even touches on it a bit in her Uncovered video. (She also makes a point of name-dropping Elle Macpherson, so that earns her additional points with me.)

I like Chase. She strikes me as a cuter Hannah Davis.


She also gives us this year's top-but-no-bottom entry.


Anyway, it’s high-cut heaven. And some girls seem determined to go above and beyond. There’s a lot of grabbing the hips and pulling skyward, as if to say “You want to see an acute angle? I’ll show you an acute angle!”


This Vogue article from last summer suggests this isn’t just pastiche. We might be in the midst of a legitimate reinvigoration of this cut. (A few familiar SI faces and bodies pop up in that article.)


Count me in.

Friday, February 23, 2018

Ayers on the G-String


So, you can vote in the model search for another week or so.

This is one of those things where popular vote will be one of the deciding factors. The other factors are “editor’s choice” and “an evaluation of the contestant’s proven history as an SI Swimsuit brand ambassador” (which is probably another way of saying “editor’s choice”).

My prediction is that Olivia Jordan (one of two beautiful Olivias we’ve been graced with this year) will walk away with the popular vote. She’s the most conventionally hot.


But I have to say, I’m finding myself super into Allie Ayers.


She’s my latest pet obsession. I’m adding her to my “no one but me understands how hot she is” collection.

She’s got a Greta Gerwig vibe going on. She’s sexy in a deep, stirring, unusual way that I can’t quite put my finger on.


Plus, she's got that long torso and curvy hips...


Downright Dalbesian.

fig. 1

Anyway, I thought she was a rookie until pretty recently, so now I’m worried that the selection process is going to screw me out of ever seeing her again. SI, don’t mess this up for me. I see a lot of brand ambassador potential in Allie.

Thursday, February 22, 2018

Thumb-Hook Thursday: Anne de Paula, 2018

This is a nominee for the Thumb-Hook Hall of Fame.


Unfortunately, most of this year’s photos of last year’s model search winner don’t live up to her promise, in my opinion.


A large percentage of her shots consist of weirdly shaped swimsuits and weirdly splayed legs.


She has, I believe, the only headless body shot this year, and it looks like an accident. Like photographer Josie Clough’s finger slipped and they just never deleted that photo.


It’s not a flattering photo of what, if we recall her bodypainting adventure from last year, is a phenomenal body.


This stripey, lounging bikini photo is pretty excellent though.

Vonnward

Wednesday, February 21, 2018

Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Topless Tuesday: Robin Holzken, 2018


You know, the world seems pretty down on this year’s swimsuit issue.

I went in with some pessimism too. There’s a lot of extracurricular activity around this year’s issue that kind of overpowered the main thrust of it.

The main thrust, however, remains beautiful women in bikinis. Or at least half-bikinis.

Enter Robin Holzken, 2018 rookie.


For me, she’s one of the under-the-radar gems of this issue.


Robin is gorgeous. And dare I say, I think she’s got a Kathy Ireland thing going. (Long live the 80s.) She has the square jaw and thick eyebrows and piercing eyes that Kathy brought to the pages.


I no longer do the “Rookie Math” that I did for 2011 and 2012. But I think Robin is Kathy Ireland with a dash of Lauren Mellor.




Anyway, this photo could easily have graced the pages of a mid-80s SI swimsuit issue.

She’s also got an adorable personality, as evidenced in her “Uncovered” video.

I’m a fan!