Thursday, January 31, 2019

Kova Girl

My first covergirl is back, again, and looking great.


See you in May, Paulina!

Wednesday, January 30, 2019

One-Piece Wednesday: McKenna Berkley

You may recall that the painted-on suits for the 2017 model search were all one-piecers.


This week’s Near-Miss One-Piece Wednesday is dedicated to McKenna, who I admit got overshadowed in my excitement about Anne and Lisa-Marie.


But it turns out she’s a gorgeously freckled redhead whom I would have welcomed in the pages of the swimsuit issue.


She also rocks a one-piece or two for Seafolly swimwear.


She had potential to be one of my pet obsessions.


Kind of heartbreaking.

Tuesday, January 29, 2019

Six Appeal

Good lord, they’re barely giving me time to root for my favorites before eliminating them…

While I looked away for a second, Tanaye was eliminated from the model search, and the final six candidates are here.

In any case, the whole sextet is worthy, in my opinion. But in honor of Topless Tuesday, let’s take special note of this black-bikini-bottomed trio: Manuela Alvarez, Erin Willerton, and Jessica Aidi.


See you in a few months, girls.

• • •

ETA: Hidden on that "final six" page are some massive and detailed photos. Like, count-the-goosebumps detailed.

Monday, January 28, 2019

Calendar Girls, Revisited: 1994

Ashley Richardson was busy this year, despite the birth of relatively few SI girls.


On March 20, she brought us Vita.


On April 16, she paired up with Vendela and brought us Kate Wasley.


And on October 26, hypnotist Britta Dubbels conjured Rose Bertram. (Thank you, Britta.)

Wednesday, January 23, 2019

One-Piece Wednesday: Jasmine Tookes

I know.


I know I talk about her a lot.


How we were one model search contest away form having Jasmine as a rookie in the 2012 swimsuit issue.


I love Jessica Perez. But dang.

Tuesday, January 22, 2019

Let’s Just Do It and Bikini Legends

So I recently watched the Netflix Fyre Fest documentary. I highly recommend it, if you haven’t seen it yet, which you probably have. It’s kind of astonishing what a clusterfuck it was from day one.



In any case, the doomed festival introduced itself to the world with some viral videos of top models frolicking on the beach in bikinis, including several SI girls.

Let us dedicate this week’s Topless Tuesday to the girls of the Fyre Festival. What’s the metaphor here… Massive failures start from the top down? Fraud will eventually be exposed? They should have anticipated failure and nipped it in the bud? Whatever. Here are Chanel, Emily, Hannah, Lais, and Rose.


And what the heck. Sharp-eyed viewers will probably catch a photo of Gigi during an early scene about the Fyre talent-booking app. Come join us, Gigi!


She may not have been in that promo video, but she’s adjacent to someone who was.

Friday, January 18, 2019

Free-Hip Friday: Hannah Ferguson, 2016


Thrill! ... as Hannah Ferguson makes the World's Tiniest Bikini Bottom even tinier.

Thursday, January 17, 2019

Sixteen Candidates

If I may treat this post as a small coda to this week's One-Piece Wednesday, I'd like to take a look at the newly revealed "sweet sixteen" ladies vying for spots in the swimsuit issue. Swim Daily has arrayed them for us, all clad in black, under this striking image.


Some of them are quite promising, among them this beautiful Marylander, Tanaye White.


If chosen, she'd join Jessica to become the second such paradox: a black model named White.


Anyway, Tanaye is one of the few in the feature to sport a one-piecer, and I'm already pulling for her to be an official 2020 rookie.


Otherwise, look for her on a future "didn't win her model search" One-Piece Wednesday.


The other girl in this shot is Brooks Nader. Obviously, she's not in a one-piece, but I couldn't pass up an opportunity to glory in Tanaye's ... just ... magnificent ass.

Thumb-Hook Thursday: Esti Ginzburg, 2009

Dang, Esti had a bangin' bod.


Hard to believe this was a decade ago.

Wednesday, January 16, 2019

One-Piece Wednesday: Olivia Jordan

For this week's near-miss model search girl, we dive into a more recent contest. Just last year.

My (incorrect) prediction for the winner was this luxurious blonde, who it turns out was Miss USA 2015.


I assumed she was a bit of a shoo-in, but it was not to be.

So here she is, modeling a couple nice one-piecers for La Isla swimwear...


...and exploiting that unbeatable combo of beach + blonde + red one-piece for something called Kid Dangerous. As far as I can tell, Kid Dangerous is a men's t-shirt company, but I will not look a gift horse in the red one-piece.


And well, I couldn't help but also include this photo of Olivia in this bonkers dress, apparently the thing to wear when you're Miss USA attending some kind of Maxim event.

Tuesday, January 15, 2019

Be That As It May

Well, it's official. The swimsuit issue will be out in May of this year, instead of February.


MJ Day claims that the issue that's currently brewing is "sexy but also shatters perceptions while being an empowering celebration of our incredible models."

Which ~*sigh*~ sounds like they're still trying to make this simple, sweet girlie magazine into some kind of zeitgeist-tapping mission statement.

I don't want to join the backlash. But I also don't think it's a great fit, and I long for the days when it was just unequivocal photos of Elle, Kathy, Stephanie, Rebecca, Heidi, et al. — a handful of models looking cute in bikinis.

I guess it's the word "but" after the word "sexy" that gives me pause.

Well, it's Topless Tuesday. You may recall that the photo above, with the magazine cover swimsuit, is reportedly Nina Agdal. So let's take a look at topless Nina through the years: one pic from each of her appearances in the swimsuit issue.