Thumb-Hook Thursday: Kelly Rohrbach, 2016

Rohrbach:

...and Rohrfront:

Topless Tuesday: Kelly Rohrbach, 2016

Rohrbachtoberfest continues.

She spent a lot of time topless in 2016.

And she dangles her top well.

Underboob Monday: Kelly Rohrbach, 2015

Haven't heard from Kelly in a while.

Whaddaya say, Kelly? Should we start another fricking week?

ROTY Revisited: 2014, 2015

2014: Who won?
Sara Sampaio.

Who should have won?
Sara Sampaio.

On these pages, I’ve sung her praises and bemoaned the brevity of her tenure. No need to retread.

But it should be mentioned that 2014 was a banner year for rookies. 12 in all, including superlative girls Hannah Ferguson, Gigi Hadid, and Lily Aldridge.

• • •

2015: Who won?
Kelly Rohrbach.

Who should have won?
This is a tough one, and I keep going back and forth, but I might pick Rose Bertram first and Hailey Clauson second. Both of them are undeniable bombshells.

I’m on record as loving Kelly, but I think either of these girls would have been more solid choices. (And they both were back for more issues than Kelly, who only gave us two appearances.)

Free-Hip Friday: Kelly Rohrbach, 2015

Was just thinking about Kelly a while ago. I miss her in the pages of SI.

Bit of an extreme Free-Hip example, but it counts!

Calendar Girls, Revisited: 1990

The very first week of the very first Swimsuit Desk Calendar. Stephanie Seymour, clinging to a rock while wearing that beautiful yellow one-piece thong. I remember it well, which makes it kind of astonishing that Stephanie presided over the birth of Michelle Vawer, a model whose one year in the swimsuit issue was already seven years ago.

But there’s Michelle’s birthday. Wednesday, January 3.


A few weeks later, Elle Macpherson was displayed on desks everywhere as future Rookie of the Year Kelly Rohrbach entered the world on Sunday the 21st.

Rachel Hunter offers Hannah Davis a pinch to grow an inch on Hannah’s birthday, May 5.

The next day, May 6, Ashley Richardson guided Jasmyn Wilkins into the world. You saw a lot more one-piecers in the issues and calendars of the late 80s/early 90s.

SI swimsuit legend Christie Brinkley welcomes SI swimsuit legend Lais Ribeiro on October 5.

And finally, two different girls — Ashley Smith and Chanel Iman — arrived (ironically) during a week with an unattached twin. They were born November 26 and December 1, respectively. According to the caption, that week's model was Yvonne Sylvander, but if it was actually Yvette who would know?

Seeing Red

I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention my girl Kelly Rohrbach appearing in the Baywatch movie later this month.

Here are some on-set shots of her in costume.

Will I see it? I don’t know. Probably not. But she rocks a red one-piece.

I’d take her over Pam Anderson any day.

In Memoriam

Farewell to the seven non-rookies who did not return for 2017.

Erin Heatherton

Only two years from a pretty well established model. I’d have loved to see more of her, though I might have been the only person to enjoy last year’s offerings.

• • •

Kelly Rohrbach

I really liked Kelly. I tend to find pet obsessions (Julie Henderson, Kenza Fourati) that are a little out of the norm, although Kelly did win Rookie of the Year for what that’s worth. (This is the second straight year that a RoTY put in only one post-rookie appearance and vanished. Sara Sampaio did it too.)

• • •

Chanel Iman

Beautiful. I think her first year was her best, but I will miss the dreamy eyes and slender bod. By the way, did you know she was in a Kinect video game where she helps you become a celebrity or something?

• • •

Gigi Hadid

I have this odd feeling that she’s been a part of the swimsuit issue for longer than three years. She somehow has the feel of a staple. I thought she brought a great adorable blondeness to the proceedings, and I’m kind of surprised she’s gone already.

(And I guess we should probably stop holding out for a sisters feature.)

• • •

Lily Aldridge

Lily completely seduced me in her first appearance. She’s breathtakingly beautiful and seems like a sweet person in the interviews I’ve seen. I think she’ll always be one of my SI crushes.

• • •

Emily DiDonato

I’ll miss her. Captivating and eerily beautiful. Aside from having a too-short four-year stint in the swimsuit issue, she also had a weird 2015 that failed to key into her natural allure. I hope to see her around in other places. I’m not ready to give her up yet.

• • •

Irina Shayk

And what else can be said about Irina Shayk? Another Russian who spanned a decade, much like Anne V a couple years ago. She was part of the issue so often I kind of took her for granted. But I think she managed to get even hotter as the years went by. She certainly didn’t lose a step. She’s a hall-of-famer.

• • •

With Irina gone, Chrissy Teigen is the last girl who predates my blog. I made my first post in 2010, a few months after the issue that included Chrissy as a rookie and Irina in what was already her fourth appearance, along with these famous and less-famous names: Anne V, Bar Refaeli, Brooklyn Decker, Cintia Dicker, Damaris Lewis, Daniella Sarahyba, Dominique Piek, Esti Ginzburg, Genevieve Morton, Hilary Rhoda, Jessica Gomes, Jessica White, Julie Henderson, Julie Ordon, Sonia Dara, Zoe Duchesne.

You did it, Chrissy. Whatever pool you girls had going, you can collect it now.

That’s the Way the Rookie Crumbles 2016

Time for my annual congrats to the rookies who returned and farewell to those who didn’t make it back another year.

It was another largely successful crop, with five survivors and only two who didn’t come back. I’m proud to say that my predictions for what 2015 rookies would see 2016 were solid. My top five returned, my bottom two did not.

I don’t care what y’all say, I think Kelly Rohrbach is mouthwatering.

Especially in a sweet one-piece.

And of course Hailey Clauson, she of the bewilderingly low ROTY voting, got herself a cover and an array of great shots.

Including this awesome one-piece.

And I’m thrilled to see the bubbly Rose Bertram is back and as bubbly as ever.

With no one-pieces to her name, but I forgive her.

I can’t put my finger on why, but I had a feeling Ashley Smith and Solveig wouldn’t stick around. Much like Shannan Click a few years ago, they didn’t seem to snap into place.

Solveig in particular is very pretty. I’m not sure why she didn’t make a stronger impression on me.

And Ashley? Well, you can’t argue with this butt.

Hate to see you go, Ashley, but I love to watch you leave.

Rookies crumbling 2015, 2013, 2012, 2011