Of COVID and Covers

The swimsuit issue started as a way to fill time during the sports-light winter months, and maybe it’s appropriate that this year’s will arrive to distract us from the pandemic.

MJ Day announced that something will be revealed on Good Morning America tomorrow. Will they reveal the cover? I’m not sure what other surprise it could be, but her Instagram message invites us to guess.

Anyway, I think the issue goes live on July 21, about a week and a half from now. So let’s whet our appetites with some of the previews they’ve dropped for us over the last few months.

Decadence

So it’s June 1, 2020. Obviously, there’s a lot going on today. But.

Ten years ago today, I put fingers to keyboard and started broadcasting my weird little thoughts and observations about the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue.

A surprising amount of stuff has happened to the issue since then.

The 50th Anniversary. The return of nipples. Recreations of historic shoots.

The foray into social issues. The widening of beauty standards for size, age, and amount of exposed skin. The shift to a kind of half-girlie-magazine, half-women’s-magazine.

The returns of many glorious veterans. The first second-generation model. The unveiling of a superstar.

SI Swim’s increase in social media, from boobcam tweets to an entire SI-hosted blog. A VR app. Live conventions.

A leaked cover. Three triple-covers. The pushing back of the release date from February to May to July.

Through it all, I’ve discovered I’m not the only historian with a deep affinity for this quaint, outdated slice of American cheesecake. There are maybe five or six of us.

I’ve enjoyed having a place to share my love for this magazine, and to share my frustrations as well.

At one point, my plan was to review the 2020 issue, whether it came out in February or May, then maybe shut the blog down (again) on June 1. But the schedule didn’t cooperate with that plan. I definitely want to see what 2020 is going to be like.

After that, who knows? The first time I ended this blog, after five years, was five years ago. And I just can’t seem to quit the swimsuit issue.

ROTY Revisited: 2019

2019: Who won?
Who knows!

Apparently voting has closed, but I can’t find anything about a winner. Maybe it has to do with SI being sold, but there’s not a real concerted effort to promote the magazine this year. There were a lot of whistles and bells, but not a lot of effective hype for the actual product.

Swim Daily is pretty much on autopilot.

It feels a bit like the swimsuit issue might be dissolving before our eyes. Does that sound too melodramatic?

There’s the fact that this year the issue was delayed from its standard mid-February release, with no real explanation. There’s the gimmicks, which could, depending on how on-board and good-faith you are, be seen as desperate. There’s the hugely popular 2018 Rookie of the Year not coming back for 2019.

Then this year’s hype, such as it was, has just kind of sputtered out.

Maybe what everyone says is turning out to be true. In a world where titillation of any intensity is available for free through your nearest screen, the swimsuit issue is a relic. There aren’t enough people like me who have the brand loyalty.

(And for what it’s worth, I haven’t bought a physical copy of the magazine for over a decade. I collect the desk calendars and occasionally grab a commemorative coffee table book. But that’s the only money they get from even me, a superfan.)

So assuming they actually announce a Rookie of the Year for 2019, and assuming there’s a 2020 issue for her to return to …

Who should win?
I am intrigued by Kelsey Merritt. She’s absolutely beautiful. I don’t remember hearing anything about her in the hype (such as it was) leading up to 2019.

I know nothing about her, but those eyes are intoxicating.

The freckles. The freckles are good.

The rest of her? Also lovely.

I’m impressed by Camille and Haley, the two contest winners who’ve had their official coming-out.

But Kelsey is the one who’s stuck in my mind. ’Til we meet again, Kelsey?

Free-Hip Friday: Camille Kostek, 2019

2019 has a surprising dearth of free hips. This shot of Camille is from the print edition, but not in her online photos.

I like Camille a lot. I’m not sure she’s “a star is born” caliber …

… but she has a warmly sultry face and some killer curves. And she’s mastered this sexy, slouchy, hips-forward posing that suits her very well.

But SI …

… I’ve asked you politely, and I’ve asked you repeatedly, please …

… please …

… please …

… find another place for your logo.

One-Piece Wednesday: Tyra Banks, 2019

Surprise.

This one was successfully kept under wraps. Tyra Banks joins fellow historic cover girls Christie and Paulina as living legends who’ve returned.

I think she looks great, personally … though the posing is a little strange. A lot of bland, widespread leg action. Tilt your hips a little, maybe? Or cross one leg in front of the other?

Or maybe I shouldn’t tell Tyra Banks of all people how to model.

She also got one of (again) three covers.

Gotta say, new rookie Camille looks fantastic. Hers is my favorite of the three. But I’m bummed we didn’t get Babs or Lais or Hailey, who are my current Holy Trinity of SI.

I’m sure there’s a tidal wave of hot takes rolling in, so I’ll keep watching. I still haven’t seen the whole trove of photos.

Calendar Girls, Revisited: 1992 Part 1

1992 provided an excellent crop of swimsuit models.

On February 12, under the Everhart zodiac sign, Valerie van der Graaf arrived.

The following week, under Ashley's watchful one-piece, we met newly minted rookie Camille Kostek.

Soon after, on March 1, Judit Masco introduced us to Bo Krsmanovic.

Then on March 26 (quite an eventful couple of months), Nina Agdal arrived, under the lounging figure of Monica Bellucci.

A Real Camille & Kalil Reveal

Neither my wish nor my prediction came true.

The model search winners — and newly minted 2019 rookies — are Camille Kostek and Haley Kalil.

They are both beautiful, and they both have wonderful, bikini-rocking hips. But, especially judging from the photo above, if you'd told me they were the same model, I'd probably believe you.

Their individual photos show more differentiation.

But dang. Especially if they were going to choose two models, Allie should have been one of them.
 

But they will make worthy additions to 2019. See you in about eleven months, ladies!

And SI: Hang on to Allie's phone number, okay?