Free-Hip Friday: Jeisa Chiminazzo, 2008

One of my under-the-radar favorites.

Horse Appreciation Week: Friday

Why the long face? Is it because Horse Appreciation Week is ending?

50 Greatest Swimsuit Models, #50-41

Ah, this should be fun. Swim Daily is counting down the 50 Greatest Swimsuit Models this week. They’re unveiling 10 a day, so they’ve already shown us who’s cracked the bottom of the list.

Thanks, Lexus! And Brooklyn, Tyra, and Kate’s cleavage!

I’ve hastily assembled my 50 favorite, so I can release my picks parallel to theirs.

I expect a pretty significant difference between the lists. First of all, I tend to get obsessed with some fairly unknown models after just one appearance. (Hello Kenza, Jeisa and Lucia!) Also, I suspect SI will stack the top of their list pretty heavily with current models, as a bit of a marketing move. It wouldn’t look very good if their current crop—your Kate Uptons, your Irina Shayks, your Alyssa Millers, your Nina Agdals—couldn’t crack the top 10.

And if you are a regular reader of this blog, you probably already know who my #1 is.

I guess my full disclosure is that the list reflects my personal tastes of the day, with factors like the model’s fame, or number of appearances, or importance in the industry, or legendary status, acting as factors in some undefinable way.

So let’s get to the fun, arbitrary rankings.

50: Lucia Dvorska

Fragile, dark Lucia. Why did we have you for just one fleeting February?

49: Selita Ebanks

48: Laetitia Casta

47: Audrey Quock

46: Jeisa Chiminazzo

45: Anne V

I love Anne's longevity. (She's been identified with some certainty as one of the models in the 2014 preview shots, which would mean she'll be in a record ten consecutive issues.) She's always struck me as a bit more "fashion model" than "cheesecake model," though I quite liked her 2013 shots.

44: Rachel Hunter

A pretty low ranking for a favorite, as pointed out in the comments section. I love Rachel, but she kind of struck me as a solid, reliable presence rather than a superstar. (Though this shot is probably one of my favorite photos in all of SI.)

43: Isabeli Fontana

42: Daniella Sarahyba

How could you deny Her Royal Smileness a spot?

41: Ingrid Seynhaeve

One-Hit Wonder: Jeisa Chiminazzo, 2008

I was very optimistic about Jeisa.

I thought she was gorgeous.

And with a nice pedigree: Her “best friend” was SI swimsuit veteran Ana Beatriz Barros.

So I thought she’d have a nice, long, bikiniful career with the swimsuit issue.

My first indication that something was wrong came with the 2009 desk calendar. Jeisa appeared in exactly one photo out of the 52 weeks’ worth. It was a pic she shared with Ana, and not a great one. Jeisa’s beautiful face is washed out, almost beyond recognition.

(To put it in perspective, Danica Patrick had three photos in the same calendar.)

Something told me that if SI valued Jeisa enough to bring her back to the magazine in 2009, they’d have featured her a bit more prominently. Sure enough, February 2009 arrived with no Chiminazzo in sight.

So we’ll have to make do with her 2008 appearance.

And the occasional sweet non-SI photo.

Swimsuit Approval Ratings: The Monokini

The Monokini (22% approval rating) ‘Women wanting to make a statement on the beach may opt for the monokini — a one-piece suit in which the sides are completely cut out, giving the appearance of a bikini, with the top and bottom sections connected by a thin strip of material. 

Guys, however, prefer to opt out. Only 22 percent liked the look. The most common response of the 78 percent who hated it? "I don't get it."’

Rebecca Romijn, 1999

Daniela Pestova, 2004

Anne V, 2006 

Jeisa Chiminazzo, 2008

Brooklyn Decker Is Getting All the Press

Happy 27th, Jeisa Chiminazzo.

Brazilian Bikini Line

BroBible.com has made a list of 50 great Brazilian bikini models, and as you can imagine, there’s a healthy helping of SI girls included. These are “under the radar” models, and Ana Beatriz Barros and Izabel Goulart are disqualified right from the title: “The 50 Hottest Brazilian Bikini Models Not Named Adriana, Gisele, Alessandra, Izabel, or Ana Beatriz.”

(There are, however, five Fernandas.)

It’s a gorgeous list, surveying the bikini-clad bounty of that astonishing country. Though it’s really 49 models, since (as with last year’s 100 Hottest Brunette Lingerie Models) there’s a double. Jeisa Chiminazzo appears twice, at #17 and #50.

#10 Elisandra Tomacheski (Not technically a full-fledged SI model. She was one of the models Jessica Perez beat out to make her debut in the 2012 issue. But Elisandra is pretty dreamy, so I'll let her in.)

#11 Ana Paula Araujo
#16 Fernanda Motta
#17 Jeisa Chiminazzo
#18 Daniella Sarahyba
#22 Michelle Alves
#24 Fernanda Tavares
#25 Aline Nakashima
#27 Juliana Martins
#28 Raica Oliveira
#38 Isabeli Fontana
#41 Yasmin Brunet
#50 Jeisa Chiminazzo (oops) You know what? I'm glad Jeisa is in here twice. I wanted her to return after her 2008 debut, but she vanished. She’ll be featured on these pages as a one-hit wonder one day.